My Post-Taiwan Blues: Reflections of My Reverse Culture Shock

After Leaving and Coming Back to the U.S. of A

I left Taiwan on June 27, 2013 but everyday as I wake up I feel as though it was just yesterday that I left Taiwan. Honestly, I can't get over it so much so that I find myself flipping through my entire blog and my photos that I have saved on my laptop to revisit the memories. It's one of the only ways that makes me smile because they happened,but at the same time looking at these pictures brings tears to my eyes because these memories won't come back. I have also been dreaming of Taiwan every time I sleep. I keep seeing the same places I visited, my host-university, my friends and classmates, and of course some ambassadors. Sometimes I even wonder why my mom keeps popping up in those dreams! This another way that my mind keeps these memories so fresh but it also tells me one thing that it's hard not to have a longing for what I had experienced there.

 For the past three weeks since departing Taiwan, I kept repeating the Dr.Seuss quote to myself that reads like this: " Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened."  I have noticed that I am beginning to take this quote in and internalize it pretty well. A journey like the one I made in Taiwan will not come back, so why waste your time crying? Crying changes nothing and brings back nothing. It only keeps me longing for what may never come back.  I am learning little-by-little to see my experience as something that tells me to change what is in the moment and to keep looking forward to new things because no matter how traumatized or fulfilled we were in the past, life keeps moving forward.

"Life is all about making transitions and learning how to deal with these transitions emotionally."

I think it was Confucius that said that there is nothing constant but change and that's true. It didn't take a study abroad trip to realize this but the trip did provoke my mind to notice changes while going to Taiwan and coming back. I noticed changes in the way I behaved around others and how I reacted to the familiar while coming back. What I came to realize is experiencing culture shock is no easier than experiencing reverse culture shock because both are equally difficult experiences to go through. People are left behind, friendships change, we crave what is familiar (or what was once unfamiliar), and other heart breaking things. In spite of all this, one always has to make transitions because no part of our life really lasts forever. Life is all about making transitions and learning how to deal with these transitions emotionally.

How I am dealing with reverse culture shock

1. Keeping a positive attitude: What keeps me going is keeping a positive attitude and finding things to enjoy in the moment. When I think positively of my moments in Taiwan and other things I can do to enjoy my time here in the states, it makes my return to the United States easier. In any scenario of life, keeping a positive attitude makes the situation much more bearable even though it is difficult. I think our happiness depends not on the external circumstances but on our internal attitude towards such circumstances.

2. Applying transferable skills: In Taiwan, I learned how to be more independent, more open minded, more willing to try things outside of my comfort zone, becoming more confident in myself,  and learning to trust myself. Ever since I have come back, I have become more fearless in doing things I once hesitated to do. I have to say that I am not very confident about my driving skills since coming back because I lost practice BUT I have been re-gaining them by driving around more often. I am confronting my lack of confidence and practicing a skill that I lost temporarily. I have noticed that I am making good progress!

3. Keeping in touch with my friends in Taiwan: Keeping in touch with my friends there has made things easier because we always share how much we miss each other and share how we look forward to seeing each other in the future. Let's hope we actually do!

All in all, studying abroad is a process that has opened my eyes to both worlds--the United States and Taiwan, both of which are quite different. The collision of the two cultures made for a beautiful life experience and lesson in that differences and uncertainty are nothing to be afraid of but to be embraced.

How I Learned to Lose Fear of Uncertainty

There are many many lessons that I have learned in Taiwan that I could write pages about but the one lesson I am so happy to come back home with is losing fear of the uncertain and understanding that even the most beautiful of all memories and the worst of all experiences never last forever. Does that mean the experiences we've had are not important anymore? Of course not! If experiences that we consider life-changing lasted forever, would these experiences still be special to us? For example, if my study abroad experience were to last forever, it would just become routine and mundane like the rest of the chores I have to do around the house. Some of these special experiences are part of the "uncertain" that we call life and the "uncertain" that we fear. I have learned that much of the special experiences, life changing experiences that I have had, were experiences I never planned methodically. The opportunities to learn and grow simply came to me and I took full advantage of them. Hence, studying in Taiwan, if I was to think back 3 years ago as a nervous high school graduate, was part of this uncertainty.

 Nevertheless, the reason I consider my experience in Taiwan special to me is because it taught me the importance of learning to embrace the idea that life does not always go according to how you plan it. I never planned to teach English in Taiwan but it happened. I never thought I would take an advanced level of Chinese class here but that happened too. I never thought that some of my closest friends in Taiwan would end up feeling like family and we even acted as a family...and you know what? That happened too. With all these surprises in store, I can't help but think that uncertainty does not have to be such a bad thing and perhaps the suspense of feeling uncertain is not the most thrilling as it is nerve wrecking. But does that mean I won't feel at the least anxious or worried? Perhaps but I won't let these feelings dominate me anymore. I will drink them in and take control of what I can. The rest is destiny or fate.

" My experience here in Taiwan has taught me that there is only so much I can know and so much I will know. I have learned that I don't have to know everything right now whether it is about myself or the world around me. "

The program director of CIEE taught me about the Chinese concept of  "Yuan fen" (缘分) which means fate and that fate is meant to bring the people whom you were meant to meet together. Perhaps, Taiwan and I were meant to meet together and we did. This is something I never imagined 3 years ago when I was filling out my college applications that I would learn how much life is unplanned, uncertain, and uncontrolled by us. I learned that we don't necessarily control what happens to us or what we may experience. We do control how we react to our experiences. The reason I say this is because much of my experience in Taiwan constitutes events that I never imagined would happen but keeping an open mind about it all, I embraced and learned from what happened.

I once freaked out because I did not do well on my Chinese midterm as I had expected. I thought I would give up on Chinese because I didn't think my Chinese is quite up to par. I also feared that I wouldn't get a good final grade in Chinese class because of this midterm grade. In reality, I wasn't taking control of the situation because I was wallowing in pain about my failure to meet my expectations. I was over analyzing and overestimating the importance of good grades. In reality, I was preventing myself from learning and improving by putting so much emphasis on grades. It was futile and it was not solving the problem so I decided to spend one hour each night reviewing Chinese. Then I realized that I was retaining more, learning, and improving my Chinese. When I started focusing on what I could do now to change things, I learned that being proactive allows you to progress faster than worrying. You see fear and worry only give you an  illusion  that you are doing something about a bigger problem when you really are not doing anything about it. This is what I learned from this particular experience and it was a blessing in disguise.

 Blessings in Disguise?

When I look back into my life, it seems as though some of the blessings we're given are the ones we don't ever plan to have. My experience in Taiwan has taught me that there is only so much one can know and will know. I don't have to know everything right now about myself or the world around me. That's the comforting part about uncertainty in life is that it provokes you to find something to look forward to because life brings so many surprises that it is hardly ever comfortable to think about a predictable life. If you are the kind that worries so much, remember that you don't have to know everything. It's truly impossible to do so.

Why I didn't choose a home stay

A lot of study abroad programs, study abroad advisers  and professors harp on the potential benefits of doing a home stay in a foreign country because doing a home stay would help you understand the culture as well as help you improve your language skills much faster. While I don't argue with that statement, I will say that it robs you of everything else that you could possibly experience in another nation ( I mean good things of course! ), the most important of all the things that a home stay takes away from you is your independence.

Studying abroad in another country should teach you independence, it should teach you how to be adaptable and flexible, it should teach you to understand cultural differences, and it should help you improve your foreign language skills. Now, I think that doing a home stay would accomplish three of the four things but living in a dorm helps me accomplish all four things and it makes attending class much more convenient. My experience living in a dormitory here in National Chengchi University teaches me all of the following things and more. I have learned so much about the Taiwanese culture and experienced genuine independence. Living in a dorm, I get to set my own study schedule and my own schedule in regards to when I will come home. I may have had that independence even at Trinity but the lack of transportation hindered it quite a bit.

Here, the lack of a car does not prevent me from going where I want to go and seeing the places I want to see. I have the MRT, buses, taxis, long-distances buses, and the train at my disposal and I don't even pay that much for transportation here compared to what I have to pay for a car back in the states. When I look at it, the transportation system here just makes me more independent as I am free to use it to travel anywhere!

But what is it about this home stay that is such an unattractive prospect? Well, just like living in the same roof as your family, there are "rules". Rules that stipulate exactly at what time you should return home, perhaps how often you can go out with your friends, how much time you can spend navigating the internet, and maybe (if your host family is really that anal) curfew. Some host families may be more lax but they do tend to worry about you, if you spend most of your time outside of the home anyways. They still need to keep track of your whereabouts so that your family back at home is not worrying sick about you! Nevertheless, I would mind a group of people constantly checking up on me when I am trying to enjoy a journey that is emotionally fulfilling, a life changing experience, and an experience that is supposed to help me grow as a person. I have a need to be independent and without independence, I cannot learn. I cannot learn because being under somebody's thumb does not allow me to make my own mistakes and learn from them. It does not allow me to see the benefits and drawbacks of my decisions because most of the time my host family will be lecturing me on do's and dont's and what not.


Lastly, the biggest reason I mind staying with a host family is that it makes things really hard when you're trying to go out with friends and have fun. As I mentioned in the last paragraph about "rules", you tend to want to stay out as late as possible and enjoy your time on the weekends. That's not possible with a host family constantly worrying about you.

Conclusion

I don't think any of the above reasons should prevent you from doing a homestay if that is what you want to do. If you are okay with giving up some space and privacy to experience another family life, I admire you for doing something I am in capable of doing. However, when I evaluated what I wanted out of my experience, I prioritize independence on top of my list of things I want to learn when I study abroad. That could be difficult with a homestay where you are obligated to follow "rules" set by your family.

What I believe in having a plan rather than expectations: A lesson from study abroad

I have noticed that people often confuse "having a plan" for expectations. Having a plan means you know what you will do next and you may have made some modifications along the way. Having expectations on the other hand, is knowing you have a plan BUT you refuse to be flexible about your plans. Having expectations is like having unrealistic plan A with a less than optimum plan B and/or plan C. It feels as though you are putting so much of your heart and soul into one thing that you cannot envision other possibilities. What provokes me to write this sentiment is the unpredictability of the opportunities, blessings, successes, and failures my time in another country has brought to me. For example, I never thought I would have the opportunity to teach English to 10th grade students and learn about the Taiwanese education system from the perspective of the kids I am teaching. I have realized that I like to teach and mentor students. That was an opportunity to learn about what I like to do and what I don't like to do!

 You see, I am so used to having a strong control over the outcome of my decisions to the point where I valued predictability but then I realized that I was unfulfilled (this was in high school). Although predictability comforted my mind, I did not feel happy with it. I wanted to try things that interest me and things that are meaningful to me. I wanted to debate issues of interest and look at issues affecting the world that take place outside of America. I wanted an education that allowed me to inquire deeply about the world and what makes our world so complicated politically, socially, economically, and spiritually. At the same time, as I ventured outside of my comfort zone, these "expectations" I had of me did not disappear. The expectation of finding a successful career after graduation and becoming stable right away. I am starting to notice how much of this is fading away because I realized that there is so much more I need to learn about myself than previously thought. I need to learn much more about what else motivates me.

My study abroad journey has provided me some answers as to how I react to the world around me but it has left many more questions. First of all, why do I fear unpredictability even though I think it offers a life of variety? Will it lead me to a path where I initially did not think about being? If so, why do I fear this? Can this be a blessing in disguise?

What My Chinese Language Learning Abroad Taught Me About Myself: A Reflection on What is Changing

Yesterday, I had an epiphany about how my Chinese language learning has amounted to much more besides how many grammar structures and characters I have learned or whether or not I have refined the four basic skills (speaking, reading, listening, and writing).  Learning Chinese here in National Chengchi University has taught me the value of patience with myself because I don't think I learn as fast as I think I do. In other words, the more I attempt to learn this language, the more humble I feel. For you see, the minute I think I have mastered learning a set of characters or grammar structure, the more I realize that I have not really learned everything. I have only mastered part of the picture. Moreover, I have come to realize that learning is not about winning but it is just that learning. I had the tendency to think so much about what I have accomplished in terms of grades that I sometimes forgot the bigger picture. The bigger picture is forgetting to notice what I am really learning and how much I am learning. It seems though that I rarely give myself credit for learning but more for getting it right the first time. I suppose it's how I have been influenced.

"I often tend to attach meaning to grades and other forms of positive reinforcement as a reflection on what I am capable of and the hardest thing to do is letting go of that belief."

Having thought about these feelings, I have started to experience a sort of disillusionment with what I have always believed. If you aren't making good grades, then you aren't learning anything. Henceforth, you have wasted your time and what you're doing is not amounting to anything. The truth is the exact opposite. If you aren't focusing on your learning, naturally you are not going to make good grades and you won't learn anything. You can make good grades and not learn anything at all. This belief system that I have adopted fulfills me in multiple ways because it allows me to set measurable, achievable goals and at the same time achieve much more than just good grades. It allows me to absorb and retain what I have learned and put it all to application. Secondly, this belief system I have adopted makes me feel much more at ease with myself. It makes me feel that learning is not just about competition but about what you gained and what it means to you. It is about making your experience meaningful to you and letting your learning inspire you in ways that you may never imagine.

Linguistic Challenges of Learning Chinese at National Chengchi University: My Pledge to Reverse My Wrongs!

TO PEOPLE WHO ARE LEARNING CHINESE: PLEASE READ THIS !!!!

I think this sounds like yesterday's news but I placed into the Advanced Level of Chinese according to the CIEE Communications, Business, and Political Economy program. Upon learning about my placement, I was thrilled but a part of me was unbelievably nervous because I have only had 5 semesters of Chinese and I can only hold a conversation about mundane topics. My classmates on the other hand either have had 5-6 years worth of Chinese! To be honest, I am the weakest link in this class and I have come to accept it. I realize that many  things I am learning in this class flies over my head at first which contributes to most of my frustrations. To be honest, I don't give myself a chance or time to process it all because I wallowed in how intimidating it all could be which led to my belief that I did not do well on my midterms. Well, that's pessimistic alright! Time to focus on solutions!

 I have decided that before every lesson I will review the vocabulary ahead of time as well as look at the grammar patterns so I am not completely thrown off. I think that's the mistake I kept making because I felt that I would process it quickly but I kept failing to do so.  I kept believing that my pace is as fast as my classmates but I forgot what I kept telling myself is that we all learn Chinese at different rates! I need to slow down and stop comparing my pace of learning to those who are already in the mindset. Secondly, I will build up the habit to spend at least one hour each three designated days to Chinese (ie. 1 hour on monday, 1 on wednesday, and 1 hour on tuesday etc). I will review either grammar or vocabulary I can't remember as well as take time to review the dictation we have to study for. I am also going to make it a point to work extra hard on zeroing in on tones because that is my number one problem. TONES are my nightmare.

So on my to do list:
1) Review vocabulary ahead of time
2) Review sentence structures
3) Dedicate three days--one hour each--to studying Chinese and reviewing what I am not good at
4) Apply what I have learned--new characters, grammar, etc.
5) DO NOT--I repeat---DO NOT WALLOW IN FRUSTRATION
6) Concentrate! Concentrate! Concentrate!
7) Allow myself time to process what I have learned and be patient with myself
8) Practice tones!
9) Do my homework ahead of time to ask questions (if possible) or at least skim through my homework
10) Learn to guess on the readings if I cannot read all of the characters

But what I have learned so far about my experience with learning a Chinese is that you not only learn to communicate cross culturally but the virtue of perseverance. It is not how much farther ahead others are of you but how far you are willing to push yourself, to exceed the confines of limits you have created for yourself. From all the time that I have invested in learning Chinese, this is what I want to take from it. So to those of you who want to learn Chinese, you are never too old to begin learning but once you begin, I encourage you to keep learning Chinese! Failures should never prevent you from learning what you want to learn. After all, I believe that much of life is about learning from our mistakes and growing. That's the attitude I am taking with language learning and the rest of my life where ever it may fall into place.

A Reflection of My Spring Break in Taichung and Hsinchu

I realize that I am writing this blog post two weeks later but these two weeks have given me enough time to truly reflect on my homestays which took place during my spring break on April 04-April 06. My first destination was Taichung and as I have mentioned earlier in my posts that I would return to Taichung but this time I received a much more traditional feel for Taiwanese culture that seems absent in Taipei.

Returning to Taichung--Da Jia Matsu
As someone who currently lives in Taipei and most of my view points about Taiwan have been influenced largely by Taipei, I was refreshed by the easy going nature of Taichung which seems less fast paced and this is the place where one can genuinely experience ordinary Taiwan, unlike what you see in all the touristy brochures, which tend to advertise Taipei as the representative of all of Taiwan. You rarely ever learn about cities like Tainan, Changhua, Taidong, and Hualien. I think Taipei can get boring easily and you have to venture out of Taipei to get another feel for Taiwan because this country has so many unique sights and experiences that cannot just be experienced in Taipei alone. Taipei is a great city to be in but many times it makes me want to go to other city where life moves at a slower and much more relaxing pace. It really gives you time to interact with others in depth. No one really has to go anywhere. Taichung definitely feels this way and in Taichung I can experience each and every moment just as I would like to. But back to the topic, I went to Taichung to see the celebration of Da Jia Matsu who is a goddess worshipped in Taiwan and known for helping solve other people's problems. I was fortunate to listen to Ma Ying Jeou speak at the temple as there were many people wanting to do the same but could not. This was my second time to be able to do so as I heard him speak at the 2.28 memorial. When I entered the temple I felt so stuffy to the point where getting out was out of question because more and more people crowded in. Thank goodness I am not claustrophobic or else I would have just had a scaring experience instead of a cultural one. However, I was able to pray to Matsu about my midterm grades which I hope are good and I swear to my grave I might give this religion some credibility if I get good grades. Nevertheless I had a blast peering at the traditional temple and experiencing people crowding in around me just waiting to pray.After spending 30 minutes to an hour shuffling through the crowd in order to tour around the temple, I was so glad there was a way out because the stuffiness simply wore out my patience. We did however get to go to random bakeries and try various deserts like Taro icecream--YUM.

Taichung--The Homestay
After shuffling through the streets eating random free food and deserts, we had all loaded in the car waiting to  be dropped off at our respective homes. My lovely little sister Debby and I were anxiously awaiting whom we will stay with as CIEE  did not inform us ahead of time even their names! We eventually discovered that we were living with three roommates--one who is in college, another who is working, and another who is working but not in college. To my surprise, I was able to hold a conversation with all of them even though I feel my Chinese isn't quite up their par. I must say I enjoyed their company and I wish to see them soon. I am so glad they decided to let total strangers--particularly me--spend a night in their homes. I brought them a small snow globe as a gesture of kindness and in hopes that they remember me. The next day we had breakfast with them and visited a nearby shopping mall.

Hsinchu
This is where I experienced the feeling of living with a host family and I think this may just be the highlight of my cultural experience because I got to meet my little sister Debby's parents and they let me experience their home town and its amazing delicacies. I truly adore Debby and her family for this experience. I had many frank conversations with them about Chinese culture and politics surrounding Taiwan as well as cultural differences between Taiwan and America. The amazing thing is that they were so open to the discussion and I realized that Debby's father and I both have an affinity for politics, which made the ice so much easier to break! The next day I visited Beipu, where I tried rather all sorts of drinks and deserts. Pictures will be uploaded soon! If I don't upload them, please message me on facebook reminding me to do so!

Guess who teaches English at Zhengda Fuzhong: Summary of my 2 days teaching

Thanks to April Wang, who is the language coordinator for CIEE Study Abroad in Taiwan, I was offered the opportunity to teach English at Zhengda Fuzhong and meet my lovely students who all happen to be 10th graders. At first I was very nervous because I have never taught before and I have never had any formal work experience with tutoring  To add to my woes, I did not have an idea of where these kids stand in terms of their level of listening, speaking, reading, and writing English. Hence, I had to experiment for two teaching days in order to figure out where they were. I have realized that I need to create a fun filled activity that can captivate their kids hearts and motivate them to practice their English. I have four very darling students whom I am so thankful to teach. They will try their hardest to do anything I ask them to do.  They are sweet, shy and they typically do what is expected of them in class (something which is expected of them in the Taiwanese academic culture), which I suppose is every American teacher's dream given the butt load of obnoxiously rebellious kids they have to contend with.  As much as I motivate these kids, I feel like I have to constantly work harder at pushing them to speak. I suppose I have not left the American academic culture in the sense that we often force kids to participate in class actively but I guess in this case, I do need to push them and I need to be more fun! Teaching them full sentences does not mean I have to be stiff. I just need to briefly go over parts of speech and how they fit into a sentence grammatically. I don't think I am too worried about what I need to do now. I just need to make them speak coherently as possible! This can definitely be fixed!

Was Taiwan Written in My Destiny?

Never ever in my life have I considered stepping out of my comfort zone to find myself in a foreign country whose culture and customs I am still learning. I never ever thought as a high school junior or senior that I would be in Taiwan learning Mandarin Chinese, a language I never thought I had the potential to master. When one takes advantage of unique opportunities offered in college, you never know what places they can take you. My studying Chinese brought me to Taipei, a busy city with a hodgepodge of colorful buildings meshed together, food everywhere you go, people walking everywhere and  of course no one can forget the  night markets! The people I meet here teach me something about the world. It doesn't even have to be about Taiwan! I ran into someone and I learned quite a bit about Ukraine (I have been quite curious about this country for a while now!) and its declining economy because of failed governmental policy in managing its resources. I am the sort of person that inquires about anything and everything so if you have the pleasure to to talk to me, be prepared to be asked a lot of questions about your country and your experiences.

Having said that I have the tendency to inquire even about the silliest things and some things that are rather deep, I must say that it must not have been Mandarin Chinese that bought me to Taiwan but an inborn sense of wonder and a need to know that brings me to an island so far away from home that it makes anyone wonder what bought me here. People (even foreign exchange and local students) ask me what brings me to this island and I superficially reply that I want to learn Mandarin Chinese and I find Taiwan to be much more livable than mainland China ( I am sure this is not a satisfying answer either). But the biggest question I have to inquire here is that is Taiwan written in my destiny? Was I meant to be here? Why do I love it here so much? To be honest, I have decided to stop asking these questions and embrace my journey to the fullest. Whatever Taiwan may bring to me will change my life. It will be a blessing either way!

A trip to Yangminshan National Park

Well on  Saturday March 23rd, I decided to take a hike on the mountains at the Yangminshan National Park. I went with my good friend Felix and a couple of his Taiwanese and one mainland friend. I must say I adore the greenery that hugs the mountains. These mountains are adorned with the national flower of Taiwan (whose name I cannot recall right now) and other beautiful small flowers. At the mountains I had the pleasure to try 肉棕 which is a type of steamed rice that is covered in bamboo leaves that you have to uncover before you eat it. I imagine we hiked for about 3 hours and then we returned to Zhengda at which I had a meeting on the presentation I have to give in a week. I think I would like to hike other mountains in Taiwan! Pictures shall come soon!

New Taipei, Keelung, and Jiufen

So last Sunday I went to Jiufen, Keelung, and New Taipei with my friends who are from mainland China. We went to the Gold museum (which is on a beautiful scenic mountain coated with greenery and  located near buddhist temples) in New Taipei where Taiwanese prisoners of war were imprisoned in a gold-mine under Japanese rule until World War II. I was able to explore the different types of things that prisoners of war made with gold. Many items such as plates and jewelry that were made with Gold. After we were done with the museum, we took pictures in railroad cars. We also ventured down hill to take pictures with waterfalls and the sea nearby with purple skies. The water was crystal clear with a greenish blue tint. I was mesmerized by it. After glancing and admiring the scenary around us, we took a bus to go to Jiufen, where we got to see the oldest road and a long night market from where I brought a bunch of souvenirs such as a calligraphy brush, a wooden post card, and some flower tea. I also brought some China from the gold museum as a souvenier. We left the university at 7:48AM and did not return until 10:00PM. The day was a blast but I was so tired beyond reason when I returned from the trip. I simply could not get myself to move the next day because I was sore. Amazing how we managed to go to three places all in one day. It was a day worth bragging about!

What I love and dislike about Taiwan

So I have decided that after staying in Taiwan for about a month now, I have decided to write a blog on what I love about Taiwan and what I dislike (hate is too strong of a word to express my complaints that I may have about this country so I chose the word dislike instead).

Let's start with the bad news first since I like to save the best for last:

1. Students are less willing to speak out and participate in class discussions: I mean come on why am I always the first to raise my hand in class? Sometimes I am also the only one raising my hand to speak out because others are too shy or they did not prepare for class. At times, I feel people might become complacent and depend on me to answer all the questions so they can avoid the professor asking them questions. I shouldn't be this upset but I think the fault lies with the education system here in Taiwan that basically demolishes any bouts of curiosity or creativity these students may have had since the educational culture relies so much on testing. On another note, the classes here don't seem engaging here as a result.

2. People staring at me: Perhaps this is something I should expect from a racially homogeneous nation but for god sakes if you've lived in Taipei or been to a bigger city and have seen foreigners, please don't stare at me. I am just a foreigner not a pokemon collection.

3. Passiveness: Okay, if I have done something wrong, please don't apologize for being honest. Just tell me honestly and I will not be angry with you. Too often people hold back on their feelings and do not express them because they don't want to hurt my feelings. It shouldn't be like that. You should be able to verbalize your feelings in a manner that does not offend me but still gets your point across.

4. Hard to find trashcans here!

Okay...that's enough for the bad news...looks like I haven't compiled that big of a list to begin with so that's good news to right? I would think so! Typically, my list would go on to listing more than 20 things but I don't think these complaints are very noticeable. 

HERE IS THE GOOD NEWS GUYS....For all you Taiwan enthusiasts

1. THE FOOD HERE IS SENSATIONAL (also convinient to find): Just take a bite and see for yourself!

2. Politeness and kindness of others is unparalleled!

3. Transportation is convenient and cheap!

4. Traditional characters are beautiful!

5. If you are into learning more about the traditional Chinese culture, Taiwan is the place:  Taiwan has preserved many of the ancient historical artifacts of China that would have been other wise lost during the cultural revolution!

6. I have adjusted to this country quicker than I thought

7. I feel really comfortable with the life here because I don't really need to get things I don't need in order to survive.

8. Places and greenery are a sight to see!

9. Taiwan preserves many aspects of traditional Chinese culture within a modern democracy (can you beat that?)

10. And you know what? This place will truly steal your heart!

Tainan, Taizhong, and Taoyuan: A 3-Day Excursion into the Bloody Cold

I guess I haven't touched this blog in such a long time that I feel compelled to write a story of my 3-day excursion to Tainan, Taizhong, and Taoyuan. If the weather hadn't killed the atmosphere of the great time I could have potentially been having, I would have loved it even more. Nevertheless, the sights I have seen in Tainan's ancient Anping,  the redundant but colorful statues of Chiang Kai-Shek and the scenic spot at which his house is located, and  the smells of all the delicious delicacies I spotted in the famous night market of Taichong have yet to leave my mind.Let's start with Taizhong first since that's where we began our three day journey in this unbearable, almost deathly cold.

Taizhong

Friday evening after I shopped for books and make sure I had not left anything behind, I gathered at the CIEE office along with my fellow study abroad students and student ambassadors. Eventually, we all loaded up in the bus singing karaoke to Chinese and Taiwanese songs both new and old. For me it was both amusing to hear others and I found others to have a hidden talent. Let's just say that there was undiscovered talent in our bus and if Taiwan has a version of "Taiwanese Idol", I am sure I would push some of these talented people to audition because they are just out of this world when it comes to singing!CIEE and its ambassadors chose a charter bus that came with the luxury of a karoake. As you know, Asians  die to sing karaoke because it is a significant part of the pop culture here in Taiwan. Singing really passed the time. When we arrived in Taizhong, I knew I had made a big mistake in not bringing a jacket because the weather was just getting worse. Luckily, I made it through the famous night market browsing just about every store and snack stand and trying any dish that appealed to my senses. That was all really but I will return to Taizhong in April for the Mazu pilgrimage. I hope that I can get more of an exposure to Taizhong and all it has to offer. And that brings me to....NEXT STOP TAINAN!

Tainan 

Riding the bus for 2 hours sleeping peacefully I had hoped that the weather would drastically change to Texas style heat. Nothing could have dashed my hopes more than the fact that it just kept getting colder. Nevertheless, I decided to focus my energies on the Anping Tree House. An ancient relic of the distant past that no one would really know about or remember but it was a delight to explore the jail cell within it and scenery surrounding it. I gazed at the plants that hung from the trees like a chandelier ( I forgot what they are called really but they were a wonder). I think I was way too focused on the nature and the scenery instead of the historical facts that my tour guide was telling me about. Next we visited the ten drums where we saw a drum performance by men of various ages that drummed to the beats of nature. I admit that I was ready to go to the hotel because I was tired so I found myself falling asleep but I woke myself up! Then we had the privilege to learn some rhythms on the drums! Interesting sight.

Taoyuan

My trip to Taoyuan basically revolved around the Chiang Kai-Shek memorial park which contained his house located with nature adorned with birds, oak trees, mountains decorated with green leaves,and a beautiful river that stretches far. I enjoyed seeing the soldiers do their ritual before I was allowed to enter the premises. This house in and of itself was elaborate and ornately decorated with Chinese art. In the house there was a mosoleum and there rested Chiang Kai-Shek's body in a black colored coffin. It almost felt as though I was going to his funeral! Nevertheless, the many colored statues of Chiang Kai-Shek was a comic relief from all the seriousness of shuffling through his house. It's interesting how many Taiwanese people showed up to visit his house. I would put my numbers at around 200-300 visitors (this might be an overestimation).


That's all I really have to say about the three-day journey!

2.28 memorial truly captures my heart

2.28 Memorial Captures My Heart

            If I can remember back to sophomore year when I took a class pertaining to the culture, history, and politics of Taiwan, I remember how excited and engaged I was by the content as it inspired my curiosity about a place I now call my new home (temporarily).  I was engaged by the history of Taiwan’s struggle to be an independent democratic nation and I am moved by how the Taiwanese achieved this feat as it involved many years worth of bloodshed and consumed countless lives.  When I learned about 2.28, I was terrified by how the police brutally beat senselessly a woman who was desperately making a living by selling contraband cigarettes.  As inspiring and engaging I found the content of the course, I could not help but think that I can only learn more about this history in Taiwan through others who have experienced it before me.  I wanted to learn more about how Taiwanese people felt about their history, their culture, and their relationship to mainland China.  My wish was granted when I was offered the unique opportunity to visit the 2.28 museums and memorial park. I was honored to listen to a man who represented the victims of the incidents and passionately spoke to the observers on how this incident changed his life and his family’s life and how it changed what he believed about Taiwan.  I did not break out in tears but when I listened to him explain this incident and what it means to Taiwanese people, I felt their deep admiration for bravery and genuine patriotism of those who died to liberate Taiwan.

This memorial captured my heart because it speaks to me of the relentless courage and the sense of duty the older Taiwanese felt to liberate their beautiful nation stricken by the hand of terror and oppression. It spoke to me that in times of difficulties people don’t give up what they truly believe in and that justice is a battle everyone fights for.  In my opinion, the 2.28 incident is truly tragic but I also believe that cries for the liberty after the incident was inspired by the 2.28 incident. In other words, without the 2.28, there would not have been a democratic Taiwan. Although I have gathered this much from the memorial, I may encounter the question of why this incident would matter so much to an American. It matters to me because this incident reflects the fact that no matter how powerful an oppressive regime may seem, it will always remain vulnerable to its people. No matter how powerless a group of individuals may seem against a government backed by powerful armed forces, it has always been a group of committed, passionate individuals that have changed society for better or worse. 

Days 2,3,4: Orientation and Adventures!

I have been here for about 7 days in total and I can't say I know everything about my surroundings to perfection quite yet. Nevertheless, I find myself navigating around the university well enough to not lose myself 5 times until I find out where I want to be(here's to some self-confidence woo hoo!!!!). I tend to believe that I have a poor sense of direction because I lost myself trying to find buildings even closest to me at Trinity. I think that after walking around the university about 5-6 times during my first week, things seem to make much more sense than they did when I first entered the university. I have to admit though that I felt very intimidated by the spaciousness of the university when I first saw it on the internet. But as I took a stroll through the university with my fellow CIEE students and student ambassadors, I embraced the spaciousness and the size of the university as it provided an opportunity to explore my surroundings. As a matter of fact, the shuttle buses around campus make it much easier to find what I need. Nevertheless, if it wasn't for orientation, I would not have been able to find my way around.

Day 2: Orientation

After the raucous,loud and exciting welcome party I enjoyed during my first day at the university, loads of information about practical knowledge was poured in my head at a faster pace than my mind could absorb. I found myself in many instances simply tuning in and listening...sometimes nodding my head at unfamiliar terms and asking what they are. Nevertheless, I learned about navigating through the MRT transportation system which is basically a well-maintained, systematically efficient subway system that takes you to various parts of the city such as the city hall and various districts within Taipei. I really love the MRT system because it is cheap and it does a good job in driving the taxi guy out of business (they do tend to rip you off!) In addition, I toured the large campus often wondering how I will adjust to walking 20-30 minutes each day just to get to class. A part of me wonders how the Taiwanese students at NCCU do it too!

ADVENTURE TIME AT LONGSHAN: 

The major highlight of this part of the orientation was the visit to Longshan temple which invited me to explore new religions and inspired me to visit a temple near National Chengchi University. Have a look at all the wonderful things I saw there!

People offering their prayers

Thought I would get the elaborate designing of the temple.

Day 3: Academics and Fire Drill?

^^Pictures of the Fire Drill

So here's to more orientation and this time it was about the headache of class registration and the seemingly amusing but comprehensive fire drill which involved trying to navigate through a room filled with smoke, how to use a fire extinguisher, earthquake simulation based on the varying degrees on the richter scale, and descending down from a tall building on a machine ladder? The fire drill went on for about an hour on how to respond to emergency situations in Taiwan. It wasn't a fire drill in the sense that an alarm would ring and you would evacuate the premises temporarily. It was a session dedicated to helping you understand how one can respond to emergency situations in a location where water systems  housing, and electrical systems are foreign to Americans. How is that for a cultural experience? Then, we enjoyed the delicious Din Tai Feng at Taipei 101.

Day 4: Health Exam

Today I went to the Qixin Clinic to get my health check up which included getting a urine test (yuck), checking my height and weight, a painful blood test (ouch), x-ray, and ears and eye check up. Luckily, we breezed through this quickly before I screamed. After that we went to the Shilin Night Market at which I do not remember doing anything particularly memorable.

The Hairy Scary First Week of Classes?

After my adventurous and somewhat tortuously boring orientation process,  the first week of classes commenced! At National Chengchi University, the headache of the first week of classes is experienced differently because in the United States, you worry about the 100000 piles of homework you will accumulate within the first week. At National Chengchi University, you toil in the uncertainties incessantly questioning whether you will get the classes you want as the system is wired in a peculiar way that prevents students from registering for classes not just based on pre-requisites but on other arbitrary things like your major etc. It is the first week of classes and I still do not have all of my classes officially registered even though I am attending them. Interestingly enough, I still have to take my placement exam for Chinese language for which I am pseudo excited about (now I say pseudo excited because I am just anxious about what level I will place in). Nevertheless, I have attended three classes this week (wow just three?) and I think I might like them (that's a good sign). Fellow study abroad students where ever you may be, I hope your experience is going well for you inspite of the frustrations you may face. I will leave you with that much for now!

Day 1: Introduction to National Chengchi University

And so the day I had anticipated for two months straight is finally here and I am in my dorm sitting on my chair biting my nails nervously because I still find myself lost in this giant university (giant by my standards at least since I go to a small private school in San Antonio). As I entered the university with my heart pounding loudly that I could not contain feet shaking, I could not help but think to myself that I will get lost 5 times before I actually figure my way around the university. Nevertheless, I think I will adjust well given the fact that I can adapt to just about any setting I find myself in. I am motivated by challenge and acheivement and having these two facets in mind keeps me going and motivates me to believe, achieve, and succeed. Knowing how well I adjust to places, I have no doubt I will succeed here and even though success seems like an uphill battle, it is truly worth fighting for. Given that study abroad is a challenge psychologically because there is simply so much to learn in such a small amount of time, I am glad I chose to study abroad and in a university worth the accolades that Taiwanese people give to it.

I went to the welcome back party hosted by CIEE staff and ambassadors. The energy that everyone gave off at that party is truly overwhelming and every single one of us enjoyed ourselves as we played trivia, sang karaoke, and competed in the calligraphy contest. I am sure I met some interesting people and hope to make solid friendships here in Taiwan. Both Taiwanese locals and CIEE students seem open and friendly so I imagine I will have made some interesting friends by the time I leave Taiwan. There seems to be a lot to look forward to and alot left to be explored.

Oh before I end this blog post... I would like to show you my dorm room!

So...I may have taken pictures of some of the strangest things but as you can see...my dorm looks a lot like a dorm in the typical state university in America. Considering these are brand new dorms, I am quite happy that CIEE staff negotiated this deal for us! I am really really thankful for this and I will do my best to take care of the dorms I have been blessed with. To end this on a lovely note, THANK YOU CIEE STAFF!! I LOVE YOU FOR THIS! Ok...maybe that was a bit over the top but I love them for organizing this trip that will change my life!

Do you have a study abroad story?

What I have learned thus far...

Wow! I can't believe my dream of coming to Taiwan has already come true and the minute I set foot into this country, the culture shock began to set in. As the limosine driver drove my mother and I from the Taoyuan International Airport to Holiday Inn East Taipei at 9pm, I could not help but peer at the hodgepodge of strange colors on buildings tightly meshed together, people walking all over the streets, and drivers trying to shove their way into lanes.  Since it was nine o'clock at night, I could not see much of anything else but I knew I was in a different world. My heart skipped a beat as my mind incessantly whispered to me: "Nivie, where are you?". Given that I was busy trying to settle in, I did not stop to think how shocked I truly am being in a country I had never seen before but have dreamed of going to ever since I started studying Mandarin. In the three days I have been in Taiwan I have learned that culture shock is perfectly normal and everyone experiences them differently.  I have also gathered some helpful tid bits for prospective travelers:

1) No matter how prepared you think you are, you will encounter a situation that you did not expect.
2) Knowing the local language goes a long way! Try to speak some of it even when you don't think the locals may understand you. Practice makes perfect and you always have to start somewhere.

3) Always try new things: new food, new clothes, new anything! Just be careful with not being ripped off  (not every country has a fixed rate and you may need to bargain for a price) and if you get sick, know where to find a hospital!

4) Adjust and overcome: Traveling to another country brings barriers both psychological, administrative (documentation, id, passport etc.) , and physical. Traveling to another country may mean you have to give up the things you took for granted such as your daily routine, saying goodbyes, understanding that your relationships (with friends or boyfriends) may change, and knowing you will come back as a different person. What scares people most is not the changes that they encounter in the country they are going to but how things will change back home after they come back! It is normal to feel this way but you must keep this fact in mind and not obsess about it!

5) Unless you are going to an English speaking country, don't expect to find too many English-speakers: Emphasizing point#2...practice your language skills or get an interpreter to help!

6) Be prepared to learn new things about the country you are visiting and about you: Traveling to another country not only teaches us about the culture of the country visited but also about how we deal with constant change around us. It teaches us what our limitations are and what we excel at. It is an exciting experience but also a humbling one. Allow your travel experience to be a learning experience.

My 3-day experience has managed to teach me six important lessons and I plan on learning more. In the mean time, I shall entertain you with pictures of my visits to different places and pictures of meeting people I never expected to meet. They shall come soon on this blog! Until then, I will sign off!

Pre-Study Abroad Excitement and Anxieties

Taking on a grand challenge of making an unfamiliar country my new home excites me yet makes my heart beat in an irregular, unsteady, fast paced rhythm than ever before (Listening to my heart beat is like listening to an untalented, irritating drummer who would drive his neighbors to call the cops). Yes, I am going to Taiwan and I will be studying at the prestigious National Chengchi University that has graduated multitudes of successful Taiwanese  diplomats, lawyers, businessmen and the like. Many Taiwanese have made it a point to remind me how anyone would be so lucky to get into a college like that making it seem as if this university is Taiwan's Princeton,MIT, Stanford, Yale, you name it. Nevertheless, if this university is of the caliber many Taiwanese I encounter describe it to be, I imagine my educational experience as one that enables me to engage in world issues, different cultures, politics, economics issues, and languages. I think this university was the right choice for given its emphasis on the humanities and social sciences, which makes it more appealing to someone studying Chinese language and Political Science.

As thrilled I am fullfilling a dream I have longed for and studying in a renowed famous university known to produce the intellectual capital which drives Taiwan forward, I still feel some what nervous and anxious to start this journey because of the climate of uncertainty surrounding it. Despite the raving reviews I hear about someone's experiences in Taiwan, I do feel relieved to know I am not thrusting myself in a location isolated from mankind and civilization (that would be North Korea) but at the same time you just never know what may happen.  That's why I tell myself to simply calm down and soak up my experiences as a sponge does water. I think that even if my experiences may not match my expectations, there is something to learn and something meaningful to accomplish. I think this little island that has a hodgepodge of countless cultural influences steming from Europe and Asia provides an opportunity to discover something truly special. Let's hope my curiosity and my in-born sense of wonder spark new ideas and thoughts. The world offers an amazing range of possibilities waiting to be explored and I just want to take it by a storm!